Sorority Member Class - Leadership Elective

Every once in a while a great idea presents itself... If you are truly fortunate, it presents itself while you are in conversation with a trusted friend and partner. Last October, I was meeting with a recent alumna and we were talking about the sorority experience. All of the usual questions that can make my life turn from a sit-com to a drama were present: How can the experience for women in sororities be even better? How do leaders really find out what really matters to them? Can we do more to help women know themselves and their chapters better?


At USD, we believe in the learning and experiences students have outside of the classroom. I believe that the experiences of fraternity and sorority membership, when done correctly, can be the most developmental experience we offer students. We want you to know yourself, those around you and to find success in your interpersonal world. This is the core of our programs, meetings, speakers, advising. I work each and every day to create experiences that build better men and women for life after USD. I want you to have a meaningful life launched by an experience at USD that is fun, educational and empowering.


If you consider that leadership is not limited to just a position you hold in an organization, it makes perfect sense that an academic course for sorority women would be offered. This Spring, USD is offering a 1 unit upper-division leadership elective course for women that are sorority members. LEAD 387P (section 4/CRN 4178) will be meeting each Friday for an hour to talk about the sorority experience at USD, leadership and all the dynamics that connect the two. Melissa Lucas, 2011 alumna, and I will be team teaching this course. We hope you will join us to learn something about yourself!


To register for this course, please complete this online form to have the hold for adding the course released.
http://scweb.sandiego.edu/phpESP/public/survey.php?name=LEAD_387_Reg_Spring12

A Home Away From Home - Sorority Recruitment

The greatest decision I made as a college freshman was registering for sorority recruitment. Now, don't misunderstand... it is not for everyone. But, for me, it was the beginning of finding my Home Away From Home. If you are in my day to day world, chances are you've heard the story of my undergraduate experience. If you are not, here are a few gems from the era of 1990...


Picture it - August 1990. Big hair, awesome clothes, 90+ degrees out, and hundreds of women gathered at SDSU to participate in what was then called Sorority Rush. In my home, there was not a question of whether or not I would go to college - the conversation was always around where. Joining a sorority fell into that same camp - it was just what one did when they went to college and where they joined was more of the discussion. My mom is a sorority member, so I suppose her experience is what drove my registration for a week-long experience that was unlike any other. I arrived at one of SDSU's residence halls and checked in two weeks before classes began. I was given a roommate and a small group that had a student counselor assigned to us. I grew up going to summer camp and youth group, so this all seemed to be very consistent with that experience. I was happy, excited and totally naive as to what would unfold.


Over the course of the next several days I met hundreds of sorority members, drank a lot of lemonade, watched countless skits, sat through several slide shows (yes, with actual slides!) and had the experience of people singing songs that I knew but had words that now included their sorority name. As funny as that reads, I was in heaven. My experience was great and I enjoyed every minute of it. As the week came to an end, I was invited to join my sorority and spent an afternoon with the women that were now my sisters.


Over the next 4 years, my sorority became my Home Away From Home. Those members became my source of friendship, opportunities for involvement emerged, a chance to care for and be cared for was solidified. This week is the deadline to register for sorority recruitment at USD - January 14th. Consider giving it a chance - you may find that perfect Home Away From Home!

http://www.sandiego.edu/greeklife/panhellenic/recruitment/

New Year, New Plan?

On December 31st, @USDGreekLife posed this question on Twitter:

What are you going to do better in 2012? Use #usdresolutions to join the conversation.

The beginning of the new year gives all of us a chance to stop and think about what we might accomplish in the next year. It affords a moment to pause and ask, "Will this be the year that..." Several years ago, I was sitting with a friend asking her if she was going to pursue a leadership opportunity that had opened up and her reply to me was, "No, this year I am going to focus on finding someone to love." Wow. My goals had always tended to be things like - eat healthier, spend more time at the beach. Low level things. Our conversation inspired me to think about how I live my life and how I choose to dedicate my energy. When I really examine where I am and who I am - is that really who and where I want to be? If not, how can I change that?

As 2012 began, here was my consideration (via Twitter, so excuse the brevity):

Taking some time to consider the places I am leading with fear. 

2012 - no room to be afraid!

As fraternity men and sorority women, we have great opportunity. Where are we not taking full advantage of that because we are afraid? As peers, your fears may be different than mine. But, I would bet that some are the same. 

• What if I wasn't held back by doubt and uncertainty? 
• What if the stress of conflict didn't stop me from leading those around me to a better place?
• What if truly being honest with student leaders costs me those relationships?

Several weeks ago, this video series was shared with me. This is a minute long clip of what one man learned during a series of travels. I hope it inspires you to think about how much more you could be. Will this be the year that you... http://vimeo.com/27244727

So, Team - the question remains:

What are you going to do better in 2012? Use #usdresolutions to join the conversation.

Happy New Year!

Winter Vacation

As finals wrap up and all begin to travel back home, I hope you enjoy the break. I will be gone for 2 weeks and taking a break from posting until Thursday, January 5th.

I pray that this season affords you the opportunity to reflect on all that we are blessed with in our community.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year from the Student Leadership and Involvement Center!

The Route to Success

What do you notice about the image below?

The arrow ends in the same place. No wonder I am so tired. The ground travelled in the image in the right is significant.  It is filled with deviations from the intended course, but also forward movement.  Well, mostly forward movement.  As you look closer, you can see that sometimes the line doubles back upon itself. In both of the images, we see LEADERSHIP.

My most obvious example of the image above is parenting my two daughters. The route to that "success" is twisted and complex. One of my greatest desires is to complete the task well, finding success. Isn't that sentiment the same in student leadership positions? At the start of each semester, I ask fraternity and sorority presidents, "What do you want people to say about you when you finish?" The answers vary, but have a common theme around trying our best and being successful in moving the organization forward. Is there also a desire to enjoy the twisted and complex route to get there?

This week I was reading a chapter on change in preparation for teaching my Emerging Leaders class. I was reminded of a few simple truths. In considering the route to success, one consistent is the fact that change in occurring. (Leadership for a Better World, S. Komives, et al)

1. "Organic change involves recognizing that individuals and organizations are a part of an interconnected system." (p 128)

2. "Developing an appreciation of resistance is critical to making change." (p 131)

3. "Individuals and groups must also develop... comfort with ambiguity, confidence that change can happen..." (p 136)

Today, our new Interfraternity Council Executive Board Officers are being sworn in. It is my earnest hope that they take on this next year with the drive to accomplish their goals, but to also enjoy the journey. As they are sworn in, they will repeat the USD IFC Creed. As I consider the facets of this Creed, I am filled with a sense of appreciation. I am appreciative that fulfilling these promises will be a twisted and complex road, but one with a lot of learning along the way.

University of San Diego Interfraternity Council Creed

We, the undergraduate fraternity leaders of the University of San Diego,
Believe in the pursuit of education and the inspiration of maturity.
We, the InterFraternity Council, promise to serve as an international shrine of
brotherhood,
One that has passion for the welfare of traditions, principles and ideals,
One that is not passively virtuous, but stands aggressively for honesty, opposing
all lawlessness and vice, and
One that is generous with the faults of our brothers, as we wish them to be with ours.
We strive to provide the tangible and intangible aids necessary to encourage academic
achievement and the practice of academic integrity.
We believe in an exemplary standard for collegiate fraternal societies,
One that respects the dignity of all persons,
And one that is conducive to the formation of gentleman.

Peace.

USD is Growing - Welcome #8

After an extensive and thoughtful process, USD is pleased to announce the addition of our 8th Sorority.  Kappa Delta will join the 6 NPC groups and 1 multicultural sorority to be the 8th member of our Panhellenic Community in Fall 2012! Over the next few months, Kappa Delta representatives will be on campus, meeting with Panhellenic and preparing for their colonization.  As they are visiting, please welcome them and introduce yourself.

Welcome to our newest friends!

The following letter was sent to Kappa Delta this week:

The University of San Diego would like to extend an invitation to Kappa Delta to colonize in the Fall 2012 semester.  This decision was based upon the recommendation from our Panhelleinc Council Extension Committee and feedback from our University community.  On behalf of the University of San Diego and our Panhellenic Association, I would like to welcome Kappa Delta to our Greek community.

I understand that you have been in touch with Katy Cooper, Panhellenic Extension Committee Chair, regarding this decision.  It is our expectation that Kappa Delta will begin its colonization efforts in September 2012.  Please be in touch with Mandy Womack, Director of Student Organizations and Greek Life, as she will assist you with any planning and logistical needs.

Our Extension Committee was impressed by both organizations that presented on campus. As a result, I am supporting their recommendation to open USD for extension to Pi Beta Phi within the next five years, but no sooner than Fall 2014. Over the next few months, metrics will be developed for our use in determining the best time for considering another NPC addition to our community.  As a partner in creating a positive experience for our students, Kappa Delta will be a part of this conversation.

We are looking forward to establishing, as soon as possible, a network of local and national contacts with whom we will work to make the colonization a complete success.  We are looking forward to building a cooperative relationship with all concerned, even before the chapter is established.

We are excited by the growth of our sorority community.  Kappa Delta’s establishment will provide the opportunity for many more USD women to have the benefits and privileges of sorority membership.  The Panhellenic stands ready to assist in every way possible in the establishment of the chapter.  Please don't hesitate to call on us for whatever assistance we can provide.

Sincerely,

Cynthia Avery, Ed.D.

Assistant Vice President for Student Life

So, So Thankful

Today, USD has an undergraduate holiday. No classes are held. Staff not taking a vacation day are relishing the quiet opportunity to clean off their desks and empty their inboxes. As I celebrate the eve of Thanksgiving, I am aware that I do not often choose to pause and look outside myself. I move too fast, focus too much on the future- and no matter how much I try to do otherwise, the pace overtakes me. Today, I am trying to do better. I committed to doing three things that would help another, but not necessarily benefit me. I have found 2 opportunities so far, and am hoping that I see #3 when it presents itself.

A few years ago, Facebook friends prompted each other to participate in creating a list of 25 Random Things About You. Did you do it? It was more difficult than I had imagined. As I spend some time this morning considering all that I have been given, I suppose I am even more aware of the difficult things I have not been given. Just last night, I received a text message from a chapter president affirming my suscipion that they were feeling underappreciated for their work, commitment and drive. This president has given their full attention to student leadership this year. They are well-liked, do well in school, etc., but as we approach the break, they shared that they feel unappreciated and unacknowledged. For all the work that has been given, they have been given negative in return. My message back was one of appreciation, but also a promise to continue the conversation of who they have been as a leader and how thankful those in our community are for them.

Below I have listed my 25 "Things". I have also listed (in italics), the blessing that I am reminded of with each one. I invite you to do the same... Truly, I want to hear about you - and the blessings you derive from your everyday life. Challenge yourself to leave a comment with your reflection.
1. I feel most upset/depressed when I am misunderstood or misrepresented. (I am surrounded by those that know the truth)
2. My heart aches and I feel called to action when I encounter social justice issues. (I work in an environment where the call to action is embraced and expected)
3. I haven’t spoken to my best friend from college is almost a year and hope to be a better friend this year. (I have friends that know my soul)
4. I believe in the sorority and fraternity experience. (My vocation is my job)
5. My Dad and my only sibling died within a month of each other from illness this past year (2008). (I have empathy for those with loss)
6. I never like to be the loudest/funniest/most excited person in the room. (I can choose to be surrounded by many people)
7. I have a terrible memory for grudges, but can vividly remember meeting my two best friends from Graduate School over 15 years ago. They started signing the 90210 theme song in the middle of a class when the clock struck 9pm. (My parents provided me with an education)
8. I married my college sweetheart. (Kevin makes me a better person)
9. I read blogs of people I have never met (and probably never will) so they aren’t alone in their journey of caring for sick children and partners. (Through many experiences, I learned that it wasn't all about me)
10. I believe that there is a need inside of me that can only be met through faith in Jesus. (I have that need met)
11. When describing most things, I use the words “best” and “favorite” regularly! As a result, I have many “favorite” students and lots of “best” pals. (People are willing to accept that sometimes I am just a little strange)
12. I almost died in 2001. It was the scariest thing that has ever tested me. I lost over 50 pounds being sick and sometimes wonder if that’s why I don’t seem too motivated to lose weight. (I have had 10 years more than I thought I would to see my children grow, serve my God and impact the world)
13. I am in my 14th year of working for the same University, doing basically the same job. (I have a job - and one that I love)
14. I saw RENT with most of the original Broadway cast in London. (I have had the privilege of seeing a lot of the world)
15. My entire childhood, I wished my name was Kelly. That would have made me “Kelly Lee”. (See #11's comment)
16. After having a daughter, we navigated (and came out stronger people) the San Diego County adoptions process. We were blessed with a firecracker of a kid who makes me a better person! Jury's still out if we will navigate again. (God has humbled my heart as I try to be a good parent)
17. Both of my girls have middle names from spiritual concepts – Grace and Faith. (My kids don't seem too warped from being raised as 'Pastor's Kids')
18. Every year my best girlfriends go to Palm Springs to celebrate our lives and each other. I treasure that trip! (I have the support, financial and people, to abandon responsibilities for a time of selfishness)
19. I was the president of the Home Ec Club in high school – yup, I am a total winner! (I can sew almost anything - and have the confidence to cook without recipes)
20. I cry at almost every episode of Grey’s Anatomy and laugh out loud at almost every episode of The Office. (I am able to understand why I am empathetic and use that to serve my community)
21. When I look in the mirror and see a 36 year old (now almost 39) staring back at me, I am amazed. I still like doing stupid stuff like gluing quarters to the ground to watch people try and pick them up. (I am thankful to be alive)
22. My first car was a 1967 Porsche. (I grew up very spoiled, but with the firm message that to those given much, much is expected <Luke 12:48>. I am thankful that I had/have parents who cared enough to teach me the 2nd part)
23. As I have grown older, I care less and less what others think… It’s pretty liberating. (I am thankful that I know my self-worth is grounded in something larger than public opinion)
24. I have seen Star Wars, Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi well over 100 times and know most of the dialogue. And, I kinda rock at the Disney Scene It game. (I appreciate that there are some inner nerds out there that connect with me on this fact alone)
25. If I could change one thing about the love of my life, it would be to have him love to play cards and games… Guess that’s pretty small, right? He’d probably pick to have me be Lance Armstrong. (I have been given an abundance of everything)

My prayer for you all is that you feel love beyond measure; contentment with who you are; and a peace that comes from knowing that you matter. Happy Thanksgiving.