Honduras? - Social Justice & Selfless Service

I can easily imagine that the #1 question around campus this week has to be, "How was your summer?" I will tell you that I have asked and answered this gem more than 2 dozen times in the last week. I have missed you... And, I sense you have missed this place.

My summer was great - and filled with one big, unexpected surprise. In July, less than 1 month from the departure of their trip to Honduras, the USD Medical Brigades club found out that the faculty member they had identified to accompany them was unable to go. On July 24th, I was identified as the replacement advisor. And, on August 10th, I was on a plane to Honduras with 24 USD undergraduates.

There were many thoughts that crossed my mind during our week in Tegucigalpa and the outlying villages we visited. I fact, I wrote quite a bit while we were there. (If you're interested in more, I am happy to share my reflection blog.) We served patients in a mobile medical clinic, filled prescriptions in a mobile pharmacy, provided dental work and extractions. We sat with people in pain, provided answers the best we could with some limited Spanish, and loved people. We educated parents and children, we practiced compassion. After three days of the Medical Brigade, we worked with an Architecture Brigade to build a Community Health Center by mixing concrete, moving rocks, building rebar towers.  We spent time together, shared experiences (and lots of music) as we travelled for hours by bus each day. We saw some things that changed us forever. Here is an excerpt from one of my reflections and a powerful example of when service becomes real to us. It was a moment when life was so crystal clear in the message that it is about all of us together.

"Last night I overheard two students from other university talking. One said. "I see these people and they have none of the things that I thought made me happy. They are so happy, and I just want to figure out why." Profound, and truly a moment for her as she navigates the road to discovery that 'she is enough'. I shared this in our final debrief/reflection tonite. It resonated with a few of them. The staff person did a great job facilitating a conversation about social change. Made me proud to be bringing these Changemakers back to USD."
"You can't live a perfect day without doing something for someone who will never be able to repay you." -John Wooden

As I consider our Core Value of Social Justice & Selfless Service and its definition, I can't help but connect it to my experience. Our full sense of satisfaction was in knowing that the little bit that we contributed in providing health care for the Hondurans was a significant impact. As a team, we worked without ceasing to help and serve those around us. Selflessness was the pervasive attitude as we examined not just the needs of the people around us, but also the systems in place. How could we use our privilege, knowledge, resources to create a better environment for people in need. Fraternity and sorority life does not have the corner on this concept. There are many people, including 21 of the 24 students on this trip, that modeled this value as non-members. But, as organizations, we have this built into our rhythm. This is what we were made to do. This is what we profess as our purpose. So the question arises - How are you experiencing this value? What can you do to make it more real for our members?

Our values. Live them. Each and every day.

Social Justice & Selfless Service

The opportunity to give is the most rewarding experience in a Greek community.   We gain a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction from working together to help others.   By striving to raise awareness of social issues throughout our community, we make selfless service a part of the way we live.

Chapter Development Advising

Last Spring we piloted a new model of advising for our chapters. Each organization was assigned to a staff person in the Student Leadership and Involvement Center that met with officers regularly and advised them on leadership development and University resources. This program is designed to be a supplement to the chapter advisors that are appointed by the national organizations. After gathering feedback and making some adjustments, I am excited to let you know that we will be continuing this program for 2012-2013. Here are some additional details on the Chapter Development Advisors program.

Purpose:

To offer the fraternity and sorority community support that emphasizes the importance of High Social Standards, Academic Excellence and Leadership through open communication, needs-based advising and direct interaction with organization members and advisors.

Advising Philosophy: 

We believe in the holistic development of members in the fraternity and sorority community. Our role is to provide supplementary advising that reinforces organizational and community values to enact positive and sustainable change.

Outcomes

• Improve positive recognition of organizations.
• Increase direct contact with and support of organization officers, advisors and members.
• Provide guidance and support for each organization to self-govern.
• Increase awareness of the SLIC staff and resources for officers and general members.
• Increase the number of organizations that apply for recognition through the Dean’s Trophy process.

So what does this mean for you... As a general member, it may not impact your day to day experience. The design of this program is so that those in officer positions have a little extra support as they work to serve you. Presidents, New Member Educators, Risk Managers and Scholarship Officers will meet with their CDA throughout the semester. Your CDA will also visit chapter meeting at least once a semester - so keep an eye out for them. Regardless of whether or not you are serving in one of these positions, your Chapter Development Advisor is available to answer questions for you, so do not hesitate to reach out and take advantage of this resource.

Please meet the 2012-2013 Chapter Development Advisors (CDA):

Emily Cunningham
ecunningham@sandiego.edu

Emily is an alumna of Iona College and member of Phi Sigma Sigma. As a second year student in the Higher Ed Masters program, she will be working with Sigma Phi Epsilon and Alpha Phi.

Sam Keil
skeil-12@sandiego.edu

Sam is a USD alumna and a member of Kappa Alpha Theta. She is a first year law student working as a Graduate Assistant with Gamma Phi Beta, Sigma Theta Psi and Kappa Delta.

Brianne McGann
bmcgann-11@sandiego.edu

Brianne is an alumna of USD and a member of Kappa Kappa Gamma. She will be working with Alpha Delta Pi and Kappa Alpha Theta during her first year in the Higher Ed Masters program.

Katelin Rae
krae@sandiego.edu

Katelin is an alumna of Loyola Marymount University and member of Delta Gamma. She will be working with Lambda Chi Alpha and Kappa Kappa Gamma during her second year in the Higher Ed Masters program.

Taylor Shramo
tshramo-11@sandiego.edu

Taylor is a USD alumnus and member of Beta Theta Pi. He will be continuing his work with Delta Tau Delta and Phi Kappa Theta during his second year of law school.

Tierney Trujillo
ttrujilllo-12@sandiego.edu

Tierney is an alumna of USD and a member of Gamma Phi Beta. In her first year in the Higher Ed Masters program, she will be working with Alpha Chi Omega.

Mandy Womack
awomack@sandiego.edu

Mandy is an alumna of SDSU and a member of Kappa Alpha Theta. As the Director of Student Organizations and Greek Life, she will chair the CDA group as well as work directly with Beta Theta Pi and FIJI.

30 Days of Encouragement: Daring Greatly (Part 2 of 2)

The past two weeks have been fairly busy for me. I have been a parent/partner, worked at my job, led the largest volunteer event that I do each year, planned for (and survived) a trip to Central America, and sat with friends in need. Even in the midst of my busyness, I am reminded that there are larger, bigger issues out there. There is grief at the loss of a soulmate, heartbreak in a relationship ending, dispair at a family being torn apart. Like all of us, these moments intersect in what can only be described as Perfect Timing. I found myself this week needing to revisit a TED talk by Brené Brown... Listening to Shame. (Back in March, there was a three part series on You Are Enough, inspired by a different TED talk by this same researcher.)

As I watched this message once again, I was left with the same question - How do we inspire courage?
I have continued to receive feedback and responses to my 30 Days of Encouragement Project and it seems that the impact on others has been significant. I am left with the question - What does it take to really inspire someone?

I had breakfast with an alumnus this summer. He was moving out of town to begin the next chapter of his life and wanted to say ‘goodbye’. While we covered many subjects during our time together, we got around to reminiscing about his undergraduate fraternity experience. He had always been one of my favorites – I know, I know… No one is supposed to have favorites. But, this one… Well, let’s just say he NEVER took anything at face value. He was one that continually “Challenged The Process” (The Leadership Challenge). Both in his chapter and in the larger fraternity community, he was never afraid to ask the tough question.

He inspires me.

For those of you that know me and work with me, you may be surprised to learn that I do not enjoy being the one to challenge and present the other side. I would prefer to work in a land of “yes” rather than having to ask the difficult questions. Sometimes, my position at the University demands otherwise. But, I always truly enjoy when I encounter a student that is willing to critically examine something. This alumnus is one of those people. He balances professionalism with a fun-loving nature. He can read people well – and often knows just what to say in a situation. He also knows his limitations, and has even been know to ask for help. As our interaction progressed, I started to wonder about how he had experienced all that I describe. As the conversation moved forward, there was a sense of self-questioning, a sense of “am I good enough to start this next chapter of my life?”

As our conversation continued, I was draw back to the TED talk. In it, she talks about listening to the messages that we have inside of us that says, “Who do you think you are? You aren’t _________ enough.” Her challenge is to support one another with empathy and real relationships. 

So as we share our lives together, are we sharing in those moments of encouragement? Do we take that moment of "wow - you are really remarkable!" and share it with the person. Here is an example of encouragement and Daring Greatly that I received last year from a USD student that I met on a retreat. I keep it on my bulletin board - where I see it every single day that I am at work. It was a reminder that encouraging someone sometimes means putting yourself out there first.

As we wrap up summer, I challenge you to consider... How can you Dare Greatly? And, how can I encourage you?

The Difference of One

Monday was among the saddest moments I have had as a professional. I received a message from Jason (aka work spouse, other half at USD, "dad" to the SLIC) that Chuck Cook had died after a 6 week battle for  recovery from an auto accident. Chuck was involved with the Student Leadership and Involvement Center and was a vibrant voice in my work world for the past 2 years.  I should also mention that I am about an hour outside of Tegucigalpa, Honduras. I am here working. I need to be focused on the students with USD Medical Brigades, yet my heart longs to be home. To be with my community, to care for them, and to grieve with them.

Like all of us, Chuck had a story. His was filled with joy and sorrow, but mostly pride. There is something about the drive to change who you have been that always impresses me. Chuck was never one to sit and maintain the status quo. He interjected, advocated, encouraged and confronted each and every day. All of that challenge was matched with a sharp sense of humor and a personality that allowed him to say out loud what the entire room was thinking. 

While Chuck was not a fraternity man, he was a friend to many of you. As we navigate this loss, there are a few things that come to mind for me, lessons that I can take from the brief time I knew Chuck...

-Don't be afraid to be yourself.

-When something doesn't seem right, have the drive to investigate and fix it.

-Love your friends beyond measure.

-If you are unhappy, make a plan and do something to change it.

-How you present yourself is how people will treat you. (It was not uncommon for fashion advice to be issued.)

-Never hold back laughter.

-Share a part of yourself with others... There is happiness found in community.

I am still filled with a sense of disbelief. How could this really have happened. He was just in the office a few days before the crash talking about the upcoming CPA exam and the hours spent studying. Chuck made an impact on me and many others. He made a difference.

On Friday there will be a celebration of Chuck's life at 5pm on the SLP 3rd floor courtyard. If you are able, please join us. Please know that the Counseling Center is also available to you, as students. www.sandiego.edu/usdcc

30 Days of Encouragement: The Project (Part 1 of 2)

Back in June, I heard a wonderful message on encouragement. Our friend was the guest preacher on a Sunday morning and shared about Barnabas and "The Ministry of Encouragement". One concept that stayed with me was the idea that encouragement isn't about making people feel better, but rather this idea of inspiring people with courage.

What does this look like in regular, everyday life? I started thinking about it and hatched an idea for a 30 day "Encouragement Project". I made a list of 30 men and sent a card of encouragement each day to cheer one of them on, to inspire them. Yes, I sent actual notecards... with a stamp and everything! There were a few days missed, but I caught up. I also followed the list in the exact order that I created it. Interesting when, in hindsight, I saw the impact and timing for some.

I wasn't expecting any responses, but I did hear back from many of the people. Their responses (and mediums of communication) were varied. A few sought me out in person, several sent an email or a text, one even sent a card back to me. It was remarkable how my encouragement to others came back as encouragement to me. Here is a smattering of the responses.

• "Did you have some kind of epiphany over vacation?"
• "I find myself longing for San Diego... The people that I love are there." 
• "I've been needing some encouragement lately (kind of reached an all time low this week)..." 
• "It... made me feel really good."
• "Can't say enough how much it meant to me - timing could not have been better for me to read it."

The wash of appreciation humbled me. Knowing that the words I had provided has given someone the inpiration they needed to believe in themselves. I didn't know that some of these friends were struggling... I just knew that they were great men. Each note began the same way, "Just a quick note of encouragement...", and included a quotation from Max Lucado,

"You are valuable just because you exist.  

Not because of what you do, or what you have done, but simply because you are."

Even though I didn't hear back from every person, I am fairly confident that they all arrived and had some kind of impact. As I reflect on the experience, I realized that around each and every corner was a potential 'moment'. Really, the chance an overflow of joy would expand and then encourage another. The people on my list were from multiple facets of my life: some childhood friends, some current students, some alumni, some colleagues, some interfraternal leaders that I am not terribly close to. People that had mentored me and people that I had mentored. What was remarkable was that even with that variety, I had no hesitation is sitting down to write a note of encouragement. During the entire project, my mind was never blank on what to write.

As I consider that fact, I felt a clear connection to the idea of Brotherhood/Sisterhood. How often do we, as a family, stop to encourage one another? If we really live the core value of Brotherhood/Sisterhood, isn't encouragement to be our very best selves a required component?

Sisterhood/Brotherhood: Within our Greek community, we share a set of common values in which we have instilled a support system to hold each other accountable to the utmost standards, ideals, and a healthy lifestyle.   Being a member of the Greek community, it creates a deeper bond of friendships and a sense of loyalty that provides an individual with a sense of family throughout one's lifetime.

As with any project of this nature, I learned a lot about myself and my priorities. The challenge to be less selfish/self-focused and more open to opportunities to encourage is still one that I am battling. If I live a values-based life, though, how could I not take on a Lifetime of Encouragement?

Coincidence?

Family Camp Fun, 2011

Do you ever have those moments in your life where you just wonder... How did all of this come together? This week, I am on vacation. Since I knew I was going to be away, I wrote my blog post last week. I arrived up at Family Camp with the "Womack, Party of 4" crew. On the first night, as we were leaving the evening session, this young woman comes up to me. She says, "Hi, Mandy. I know you're not working right now, but I wanted to introduce myself." I, of course, was a bit confused... She then shared that she is a student at USD and just finished her first semester as a sorority woman. What are the chances... Same week, same camp... Coincidence? Or, something bigger. In the strangest turn of events, she is a young woman whose Aunt is a colleague of my husbands... She was on my list of students to contact once classes begin in the Fall.


We have chatted a bit since that first night. Each time we see each other, she has a giant smile. I am so glad to have a new "friend". Coincidence? Or, something bigger?


This has me thinking... How often do we write off coincidence instead of taking advantage of the circumstances? For me, there is a component of faith here, too. Do things just 'happen' or is there a larger plan in place? (But, that is a different post for a different day...) In our organizations and your friendships, there are continually moments of coincidence. How many times do we discover something that is new and fresh to us, but has always been there? When it happens, do you take advantage of the opportunity? Or, do you just smile and move on.

We have hit the mid-point of summer. Some of you haven’t left San Diego/USD, some of you are across the globe. Challenge yourself this week to take advantage of the coincidences in your life. You may just find, that the moment that seemed haphazard could change your life.

Peace.

One Sentence

Fun Fact: I follow multiple blogs. It is a strange hobby of sorts. At current count, there are 71 that I am currently reading via a blog reader app. It started out as following the journey of one family's tragedy. Over time, I have added some professional blogs and some from friends - I even follow one of a USD parent that I don't know, but is really funny. And, of course, most recently I have added two different tumblr blogs. I mean, really, what's not to love about that whole phenomenon.

When it comes down to it, I just really enjoy storytelling. As I read these different posts, I am able to engage with others experiences. I can empathize, I can laugh, I can learn more about difference, and tackle the adaptive work of looking at my world & comparing it to theirs. I feel very fortunate to be a part of so many stories and truly great storytellers.

One of my favorite blogs is called, One Sentence.

"One Sentence is an experiment in brevity. Most of the best stories that we tell from our lives have one really, really good part that make the rest of the boring story worth it.

This is about that one line.

This is about telling the most interesting or poignant story possible in the fewest number of words.

This is about small bite-sized pieces of extraordinary lives and ordinary lives alike... the happy, the sad, the funny, the depressing.

Tell your story."

There is something about the honesty and refreshing clarity that comes from summarizing your story into one sentence. There is a cloud of tags that people can attach to their one sentence. I often find them to be as powerful as the sentence itself. They are a mix of funny and tragic, but each time my blog reader reports a new post I read it first.

I have written several times about being real and authentic with one another. I have tried to educate, lead, coach and model what having vulnerable relationships with one another looks like in the context of fraternity and sorority life. My hearts passion is for each of you to live a life that is fuller, more meaningful and completely genuine. Maybe this idea of "one sentence" to describe us is a way to get there. I have tried and worked at this exercise several times and it is not as easy as I had imagined. I enjoy the detail of life... There is always more than that snapshot moment. 

Here is the closest I have come:

It wasn't until the 5th time that I saw my sorority's initiation ceremony performed before the words really made sense to me.

Can you do it?